Monday, December 18, 2006

I Was In Da Moovies!

It sure was cold back in 1918. It must have been because the world was not heated by the fires of the Brad. People ask me if I saw Brad. I tell them he wasn’t born yet in my particular scene.

Cold. It was terrible. But I got a pair of thermal under-leggings out of it. I brought a whole slew of things to occupy my down time with, and ended up using none of them. Laptop. Comics. A book without pictures (Chris’ idea. Bah). They remained in the bag. The one thing I wanted to bring, my Electric Blue Nintendo DS, stayed at home. That would have been the thing used most between takes. I could have hid it in my WWI-era trousers and drew some rainbows in between takes. Gotta remember that if there is a next time.

Three angles of one scene took the whole 8 hours. Jason Flemyng running through 1918 style post WWI revelers in the Pedestrian Mall in Jackson square. Two overhead crane shots and a long dolly shot. It was nice to see the mechanics of the filmmaking process laid bare like that. David Fincher sitting in a black tent watching replays of each take on three big LCDs. The DP framing the shot using the same LCDs from inside the tent. I guess that’s how movies are made when studios have lots of money to throw around. Or maybe it was just too cold. Who knows.

The Curious Case of Benjamin Buttons isn’t even slated to come out until 2008, it must takes a long time to put the head of an old man on the face of a tiny boy. In the meantime, since you won’t be able to see my beautiful face in all it’s cinematic glory, here is the screen test that got me in the pitchas. Good thing I had a MacBook Pro handy, and a stolen copy of Quicktime Pro to do a video capture. Otherwise I might have never been as famous as I am today.

Would I do it again? 75 bucks and a free meal for a whole lot of sitting around and the chance to watch a movie get made. For a poor college student who has an above-average obsession with movies?


Wednesday, December 06, 2006


Fuck you, Mel Gibson.

Just came from a screening of Apocalypto, the Gibson opus about the decay of a multi-goded society named the Mayans. If only they let Christ into their hearts, they might not have been such heathens.

What merit did this film have? Was it shot well? Slow motion and forest. Oh, and gore. Not a single discernable, or memorable shot throughout the film. That of course did not stop a pretentious fuck leaving the film to compliment the way it was shot, because most people cannot dispute that. They can only nod along, not wanting to sound like the fool who does not understand cinematography.

Was it accurate? I’m not a Mayan expert, but some appreciated its accuracy in terms of the total decay of the society from the inside out, a commentary on the fact that the society was not conquered by Spaniards, but by themselves. The only problem with that is the same person who appreciated it’s “accuracy” also commented on the fact that the conquistadors who appear at the end of the film, signaling that the terror is over, came around 200 years early. Much love for the accuracy.

I gots no love for a film that has a string Gibson motive permeating it. I got the sense that I was supposed to feel sorrow for the heathens, but at the same time, there is a culture falling apart from the inside on display, complete with Mel’s characteristic flare for snuff. Based on his crazy Christianity, the only conclusion I can make is that he believes that the culture was flawed completely and us Europeans killing them and bringing disease and our one god saved them. Crazy bastard.

Did it have good pacing? The entire third act was a goddamn chase scene. Complete with live birth, impalings, more chasing, a Fugitive-esque drop down a waterfall, and finally, Christians. Goody. My kind of snuff.

That flick made me damn angry.

I’m out.

Wednesday, November 15, 2006


New apartment. Same bedroll that was my consolation prize for losing my entire home and all of my childhood memories. It is a nice bedroll, however. My battery is not full and I need to urinate. The crack in the window in my new room let some of the rain from last night in. Next to me are some comic books, some DS games (comfort items), most of my clothes, my trusty bag, and a “hurricane” lamp lent to me by Chris. Bland observations.

I feel like a squatter sleeping in a house without power. Especially sleeping close to the ground on the aforementioned bedroll.

How is this any better than the FEMA trailer? Good question. It turns out I am a squatter with internets. FeatherByEarthLink is free in this area for New Orleans residents apparently.

Yesterday felt like some kind of a great cleansing, collecting my things from various nooks and crevices in the trailer. It felt like I was moving out of a hotel room. The transience of the trailer was/is an odd feeling. Despite the new house having all the accoutrements of a normal house, or even a fully loaded FEMA trailer, when I was packing I had the sense of excitement and abandon one gets when moving. We are indeed Moving On Up.

I really hate talking about myself. I want to talk about a special edition, Japan only DS Lite. Crystal White, Final Fantasy characters etched on the outside. Beautiful. THREE HUNDRED DOLLARS. They get all the cool stuff in Japan :<.

Wii. Spellcheck, one day you will recognize the validity of those three letters strung together. If we don’t have power by Wii Day, (Nov 19) I may have to jack someone’s house/tv/electricity. I cannot wait to feel the Wii-Mote Nunchaku beneath my fingertips.

Hyperbole for breakfast.

Time to urinate.

Thursday, September 14, 2006


The accomplishments of the successful in history can be based solely on them having a wealth of leisure time.

I don't care if it's been said before.

That is all.


Monday, June 26, 2006


I’m gonna try not to sound like an elitist bastard, but it’s going to be hard.

I was sitting in the parking lot of a gas station in Algiers in My Fair City(tm) and a Friedmanly(?) idea came to mind. I saw this geto (i spelled it right) white boy in an SUV drove past in the “i’ve never driven a manual automobile in my life” pose. It immediately hit me, the idea of the decentralization of fashion centers and trends, and the lowering of “the bar.” I will explain.

I had just noticed a big fuggin truck driving in the Quarter, and Marcella said something to the effect of it being a stupid choice to drive in the Quarter, since it’d be a bitch finding parking. So I began to wonder where the trend of big ass trucks and SUV’s came from. It couldn’t have been from one of the traditionally viewed centers from where culture, fashion, and trends came from, since it would be massively inconvenient to have such a beast. Marcella pointed out the desire to have excessive things could very well be the cause of this, similar to having pets, but I think it goes further than that.

The utilitarian need for these types of vehicles says to me that the vast masses of people in the great unwashed middle of this country popularized the notion of a utility vehicle (sport or otherwise) and thus have a say in what becomes “popular.”

Here’s where I sound like an asshole.

This is bad.

The proliferation of technology, having the Friedman flattening effect, has allowed people in the rest of the country to have a say in what happens in terms of trends and popular culture. 100 years ago, people emulated the popular culture of the time, i.e things they thought people in cultural hubs did in their spare time; going to the theater, consuming intelligent books, and the like. I believe vast highway systems linking the country, plus radio. plus television, plus the GODFORSAKEN internet, has flattened the consumption of culture.

What’s so bad about that? Isn’t blogging the coolest thing since sliced internet? The whole democratization of information has allowed people to be their own muckraking journalists, and that, my 3 friends, is the key to getting us out of this slump. But observe popular culture. What do people find “cool?” What is on our televisions? What novels populate the shelves of Wal-Mart and grocery stores, traditionally well renowned centers of learning?

People in the media must now pander to the great unwashed, because they know what they want, because people don’t tell them anymore. And now that people are able to consume things that indulge their most base feelings (complete violence/badass-osity, humiliation i.e reality t.v or Springer, Rush Limbaugh) without fear of reprisal, they do it happily. Look at our president. The intelligentsia stopped having a big say in who gets to be president, and who gets to be a congressperson(Dems ran it for 40 straight years) and we get Newt-motherfucking-Gingrich, and good ‘Ol Bush.

No Bush bashing here, I’m not hip enough to do that. Just commenting on the so called “cultural divide” or “red state v. blue state business.

It has to get worse before it gets better.

There are tons of good reasons why I’m not living on a fucking mountain, bereft of all the tech I find good and holy in the world; simply put, I like it. It has the most massive potential for good. For reals. My utmost hope is that people realize the power they have, realize the fact that they’re active participants in this society, realize what they consume has an effect on the world as a whole.

Blogging is a good thing. Getting one’s thoughts on paper is good. Fuck, e-paper, whatever, it’s better than texting someone something that a 4th grade teacher would give a big fat F for in grammer. Airing one’s personal shit online, people getting pissed about not being on someone’s “Top 8” on fucking Myspace, not a good thing. These things take time. I really have no faith in humanity, so I don’t know why I think it could possibly get better, why I think people will vote with their dollar, and not on American Idol, but I’m a fool.

Hell, I think the $100 dollar laptop ***olpc*** will work as intended, and not be a huge item for black market ripoffs and further resellings, so how dumb am I right?

Just another self loathing, elitist geek, who simultaneously reviles and wants to coddle humanity.

Wow, Red Bull makes my hyperbole show like a dog’s engorged lipstick.

Done. For reals this time. I gotta watch me some Arrested Development.

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

Ooh Shaa, No Sha NO

The rear windows leapt up with a touch, like frogs in a dynamite pond


Certainly an apt description when describing how blindingly (i almost typed blingingly. heh) fast the windows rearrange themselves, exposé style.

I am truly a Mac convert now, I don’t rely on benchmarks that give a numerical value to the sheer 3d processing power my computer can output, all i care about is that it resizes my windows in an expedient manner, EVEN WHEN I am reading comic books at the same time. Important, Quite.

I wrote that stuff like 5 days ago when I installed new memory in my MacBook. That’s right, there are even instructions in the “getting started” manual they send you with the computer. UPGRADABLE MAC? LAPTOP? omg man, omg. My mind is blown regularly by those geniuses up in Cupertino.

I may as well just change the name of this blog to MalcomOSX, given the amount of webspace I give those fuckers. I’m thinking about a haircut, lemme know what you think about it.

I really don’t want to read Once Were Warriors, I’d rather shoot heroin into the head of my penis, but alas, I must fulfill my literary obligations before I get to partake in the recreational.

I think you know what I’m talking about.

Saturday, April 08, 2006


So, anybody out there with one of those sweet new MacBook pros just itching to play something other than WoW? I know I am. A fucking Radeon X1600 in a pci-x slot? The video card is better than the one on my home computer!

Enter Boot Camp, Apple's dual-boot solution for peeps who want windows on their Mac. Why? DAWN OF WAR ON MY FUCKING MACBOOK THAT'S WHY.

Apple is the coolest fucking company that was ever created. Now people can switch to Mac with the knowledge that they can still have a Windows lifeline. Not that they'll ever go back. Except to play Dawn of War that is.

Off to Boot Camp. My Mac shall emerge...............................

Wednesday, March 15, 2006


It appears that the creators of Penny Arcade have “made the switch.” Two of the webcomics biggest geek gamers, bashers of the beloved platform, now they see the light. Makes me want a MacBook even more, cause apparently they can rock “teh wowz” probably better than my box.

This is what I mean when I say that geeks need to learn that their deep-seeted views tend to bite them in the ass, EVENTUALLY. I used to be that kind of geek. I used to hate the Macintosh. I used to hate ATI videocards. I still don’t like Intel that much. Yet, I own an iBook, have an ATI Radeon 9800 in my PC, and can’t wait to get my hands on an Intel based Mac.

The strangest thing about tech oriented geeks having canonic points of view is that THINGS CHANGE. In the realm of ever expanding computer technology, things change almost daily. So to base some kind of fanatical iedas on such a shifting realm has ceased to make sense to me. So I don’t do it anymore. It makes one look foolish. I was one of those geeks who would get all confrontational when people even uttered the word Apple. The funniest thing about the Apple bashing I endure in the CS lab is that as soon as the grad student who owns a iBook enters, IT STOPS. They aren’t so steadfast in their anti-Apple beliefs that they would take on a grad student in a PC v. Apple debate.

If I don’t keep my headphones on before English class starts, I swear to god I’d probably pull a Patrick Bateman on the loud girl and the kid who paces the front of the classroom doing weird shit for the sake of being weird. Not to mention the kid with the deep voice who’s pre-class pseudo English major analysis really bugs me. I’m really happy there aren’t annoying people in my major. HA HA.

Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Tyler Durden Was Wrong

“We are the world’s lost children. We have no Great War. No Great Depression, We are the middle children of time.”
-Tyler Durden

Sorry guy, but if these slacker post-moderners paid attention to anything they’d know that the next revolution is a global one. And we as Americans are just as blind as Mr. Durden to see it.


And if we don’t wake up to it, and learn to compete with the billions of Indians and Chinese, we are doomed to lose. So keep writing books Mr. Palahniuk, until the smash bestseller from Xiang Chiang comes stateside and blows your shit off the shelves.

Why am I such a fatalist? Damn you Thomas Friedman. Ya scarin tha kids!

Friday, January 27, 2006


WHY? (i’d give a better link but the anticon site sucks) doesn’t sound like TMBG like Marcella claimed them to, but they sure make me want to listen to They Might Be Giants. Is folk-hop the right word? That’s what the anticon website bills them as, but I hate those fusion type labels like high-pop, or trip-hop. Those words just bug me. Not because I’m one of those types that think music is too diverse to pigeonhole, or any of that bullshit. It’s just that when people try to apply labels to something genuinely different sounding to describe it, it just doesn’t ring true to me. Compare artists to other artists, that’s the best way to describe music to people who haven’t heard it before. Folk-hop. What the fuck is that?

Here goes my review: WHY? has a similar voice to the guy from The Postal Service, plus the flow style of Beck (I guess that’s where folk-hop came from?). The tracks are very diverse, so a TMBG comparison might be valid, but I’d say no, cause it has a slight tinge to the anticon hip hoppy style. Acoustic plus downtempo beats like Mirah too. Except no female vox.

I couldn’t do it, I had to reference genre. But it was only to reference a particular facet of the group/label. I am a failure as a music critic.

Regardless, I’m diggin it.

The coolest thing about iTunes is how when it’s not on shuffle, it invariably goes to the next artist when their cd’s over. And thanks to the wonders of the alphabet, WHY? segues into Wu-Tang 36 Chambers. How nice.        

Sunday, January 22, 2006

Non-Live Journal

I can’t believe how readily available journaling/blogging/’airing one’s personal, drama causing shit’ software is. At least compared to journal-type software for one’s personal use. Because, you know, what’s the point of a journal unless all your friends can read it?

MacJournal. It’s pretty nifty. In fact, this post is being edited from MacJournal, then will be uploaded directly to Blogger. For no one to read there too. Of course I opted to not use the software for a 15 day trial. 15 days isn’t long enough to evaluate software, so I looked in my Serial Box and found a cracked serial to try it out for a while. So far I love it, and will probably pay for it, since one day I hope to support myself by writing software.

The reason I want this journal app is not to write sappy poetry ‘too private for the internet.“ Actually I’m going to use it like I wanted to use iCal, to keep track of school assignments, notes and whatnot, complete with the link service I so love and use on my blog. The nifty thing is I can make hyperlinks to files stored on the computer within the entry, so for example if I’m waxing geeky on a programming assignment, I can link the relevant file so I don’t have to go hunting for it. It seems my transformation into a Mac fanatic is complete. I can’t even be bothered to click a few times to get to the file in Finder. I require colored text encircled by thoughts about said file, complete with a timestamp for the whole shabang.

After the hurricane, I had a shit ton of momentum built up about performing well at UNO, which I attempted to carry over to LSU. While I ultimately did not complete the semester there for many reasons, I was experimenting with using my laptop productively at school, for classes other than Comp Sci. I began taking notes in class using TextEdit and filing them away with the dates in class folders. I put my schedule of classes with room numbers and building names in iCal so I’d remember where I had class on that massive campus. I even put the reading assignments and other homework items in iCal so I’d be more inclined to do them. Links to class pages and related things were in a special class links folder in Firefox. I figured that since every August we get bombarded with advertisements from Dell saying that Junior will be the hippest kid in school and do really well in class to boot if he has a laptop, that I might as well try and use my baby as a focus for all my studies, not just Comp Sci. MacJournal is the thing I tried to make iCal be. And it rocks.

The locked journal on my comp is where my Emo songs go, so ummmmm, if you’re ever on my comp, DON’T LOOK THERE!!!

James’ car is broken, and I’m in Orange County writing this on the way to a party in NO, so I’m out.

Monday, January 16, 2006

You Say Red Beans.....

I say culinary abortion. Now I know why they package Tabasco sauce with those MRE's. The red beans and rice with 'cajun style' sausage cubes I just consumed was so awful. Not even Tabasco could fix them beans.

Reread A Scanner Darkly in anticipation of the movie. I can't believe I'm really looking forward to it. The idea repulsed me when I first heard of it. When I saw Keanu in all his interpolated rotoscoped glory (the thing they did with Waking Life, drawing over filmed footage) scared the bejesus out of me. I even bought my own copy finally so that I wouldn't have to get one with Keanu lookin like 'whoa' on the cover. But the more I read about it, I think it might be ok. Now I don't buy this bullshit that the CG technique they used (interpolated rotoscoping) was to 'evoke a haunting vision of the future' or whatever. I know Richard Linklater directed Waking Life too. This is just him wanting to use that technique again, but I've made my peace with that.

When I read things, written by Dick's own daughters, like the fact that the afterword in the book is also included (a really sad musing about drugs, likening it to kids playing in the street, followed by a list of people drugs killed or impaired that he knew, Phil also appears on the list) in the film treatment, I think it could be better than Paycheck. Sweet all knowing pink laser in the sky, Let It Be Better Than Paycheck.

Besides, the scramble suits will look much cooler this way, and not so out of place.

On the non-fiction tip, The World Is Flat is my attempt to make it on the dean's list this semester. By reading about the kind of tech-related jobs I desire when I finish school being outsourced to India, I get scared. So in order to compete with the 225,000 grads that India churns out every year, most having CS or engineering degrees, I am angling to be one of the best geeks UNO can produce.

Financially opress a large nation for long enough, they get hungry. Hungry for American jobs that rich CEO's who want to make their stockbrokers even richer are more than happy to outsource. I don't want to be a Tech Support phone jockey. But these guys are moving up the production chain on the regular. Some of them do the actual R&D for these software companies, not just the data entry, or code monkey jobs that I could also do without.

Maybe I should've listened to Mustafa Starwars, Bengali(an Indian dialect) is the most spoken language in the world. Being that one billion people speak it, Maybe I should take that as my foreign language.

Bangalore, HERE I COME!!!